Seeing Eye to Eye

There are times when my inner voice participates in conversations.  Like yesterday, during an eye exam with a new doctor...

Doctor - You'all (he's clearly from the south) remind me of someone

Me - Oh really, who?

Inner Voice - OK, who, Ethel Merman?  Tugboat Annie?  Bruno the Wonder Chimp?  Stop me if I get close

Doctor - That actor fellow, Orson Welles

Me - Oh really?  He was a brilliant actor and writer.  Citizen Kane is a classic.

Inner Voice - So you're saying because I have a gray beard we look alike?  Orson and I were both chubby and therefore sisters?  Or is it that he's dead and you think I look that way?

Doctor - Well, maybe you look more like that actor guy who played a judge.  I think he did a show with him in a wheelchair

Me - You must mean Raymond Burr?  Ironsides was the TV show?  I can't recall him playing a judge but he did play a lawyer, Perry Mason, for many years

Inner Voice - OK, that confirms it.  I remind him of old, graying, chubby men who all happened to be dead.  Why thank you!  Beatch!

At least the eye exam went well.  I'm not quite ready for the tin cup and pencils... yet.